From the Pastor - Feast of the Holy Family

December 29, 2023

Today, we celebrate the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Just as the Holy Family is holy, we are also called to be holy. This holiness is achievable by living as disciples of Christ.


St. Paul calls us to put on “heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience… as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.” Let us “give thanks to God the Father” by being good stewards of His love and mercy to all our family members.

Today's Gospel says a lot about trust and surrender to our Lord. When Simeon and Anna prophesized about what was to come, Jesus' parents were “amazed at what was said about him.” We can imagine that two parents would be taken back by these words! Yet, the Holy Family surrendered their lives to God and had unwavering faith and trust in His plan.


God’s plan will fulfill our hearts more than we could have ever imagined. Like the Holy Family, we just need to trust, surrender and be attentive to God’s voice. © Catholic Stewardship Consultants, 2023

 

Pastoral Pondering

We have been discussing those things that damage, attack, or weaken marriage.


The Church defines marriage as a covenant relationship that is to be a partnership of the whole of life (see CCC, 1601). My academic work in canon law focused on the introduction of this one phrase in canon 1057, §2 of the 1983 Code of Canon Law. And while that might seem to be a rather small thing in the overall scheme of things, it actually gives rise to the overall Catholic understanding of marriage. The institution of marriage has particular properties and ends that make up the substance of marriage itself. These properties are unity, indissolubility and fecundity. These three support the ends of marriage, the good of the spouses and the procreation & education of children. Hence, permanence, fidelity and openness to life are the three legs of the tripod that support marriage and place it on a firm foundation.


Since we’ve already addressed infidelity (adultery) and permanence (divorce), our liturgical feast provides a good opportunity to discuss the openness to children and its importance to marriage.


Paragraph 2366 of the Catechism says this:

Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which "is on the side of life" teaches that "each and every marriage act must remain open 'per se' to the transmission of life." This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act."


Concerning the regulation of births, Paragraph 2370 says this:

Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality. These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, "every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible" is intrinsically evil:


Thus, the innate language that expresses the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive refusal to be open to life but also to a falsification of the inner truth of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality.... the difference, both anthropological and moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle . . . involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of the human person and of human sexuality.


Hence, contraception violates the very essence of marriage because it says, “I give you myself, BUT not this part.”


It is also helpful to remember how prophetic Pope St. Paul VI was when he warned in Humanae vitae:

Responsible men can become more deeply convinced of the truth of the doctrine laid down by the Church on this issue if they reflect on the consequences of methods and plans for artificial birth control. Let them first consider how easily this course of action could open wide the way for marital infidelity and a general lowering of moral standards. Not much experience is needed to be fully aware of human weakness and to understand that human beings—and especially the young, who are so exposed to temptation—need incentives to keep the moral law, and it is an evil thing to make it easy for them to break that law. Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection.


Finally, careful consideration should be given to the danger of this power passing into the hands of those public authorities who care little for the precepts of the moral law. Who will blame a government which in its attempt to resolve the problems affecting an entire country resort to the same measures as are regarded as lawful by married people in the solution of a particular family difficulty? Who will prevent public authorities from favoring those contraceptive methods which they consider more effective? Should they regard this as necessary, they may even impose their use on everyone. It could well happen, therefore, that when people, either individually or in family or social life, experience the inherent difficulties of the divine law and are determined to avoid them, they may give into the hands of public authorities the power to intervene in the most personal and intimate responsibility of husband and wife.


A careful study of the historical record shows clearly how the widespread acceptance of contraception has led to marital infidelity, the bad fruit of the sexual revolution (seeing sexual intimacy as more of a recreational activity than its intended use) including abortion, infidelity, promiscuity, and the like. By extension, we can also see that once the marital act is separated from marriage, marriage loses a sense of what it is, opening the doorway to redefining marriage in any way one wants.


The Dicastery for the Doctrine of the Faith’s recent decision to allow for the blessing of same sex couples who have attempted marriage, while perhaps being well-intentioned, adds to a greater level of confusion about the inherent nature of marriage and its importance to the life of the Church. The document clear that any blessing must be outside of an official liturgical action or ritual, but, human nature being what it is, and priests being fallible as we are, this will be abused and confused leading to even a greater diminishment of the understanding of marriage in our secularized culture.


From the Pastor

By John Putnam • November 6, 2026
Wisdom is at the heart of today's readings. It is one of the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit and an essential gift for living the stewardship way of life. As Christian stewards, we should continually ask the Holy Spirit to deepen this gift within us. In today's Gospel, Jesus tells the parable of the 10 virgins waiting for the bridegroom. Five are wise, and five are foolish. The wise virgins prepare ahead of time, bringing enough oil to keep their lamps burning. The foolish ones fail to prepare and are caught off guard when the bridegroom arrives. Jesus concludes with this reminder: "Therefore, stay awake, for you know neither the day nor the hour." Stewardship helps us live with that same spirit of readiness. When we seek the Lord each day through prayer, the sacraments, and the faithful use of the gifts He has entrusted to us, we keep our hearts prepared to meet Him whenever He calls. That is the wisdom Christ desires for each of us. © Catholic Stewardship Conference, 2026 Pastoral Pondering - Rooting Out Anger Few things disturb the peace of a home, a parish, or a soul as quickly as anger. A sharp word at the dinner table, a resentful silence after Mass, a flash of irritation in traffic-each seems small in the moment, yet the Fathers of the Church warn us that anger is a deadly poison. St. John Cassian, the great monastic teacher whose writings shaped Western spirituality, dedicated an entire book of his Institutes to this vice. His counsel is bracing and practical for us today. Cassian insists that anger must be "utterly rooted out from the inmost corners of our soul." As long as it remains, it blinds the eye of the heart. We lose right judgment, the capacity for true counsel, and even the ability to pray. "The wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God" (James 1:20). Whether the provocation seems just or unjust makes little difference: anger covers the eyes of the soul like a plate of gold or lead- the value of the metal does not restore sight. He rejects the common excuse that we may be angry with those who do wrong, or that Scripture's language of God's "anger" justifies our own passion. God is free from all disturbance; the biblical language of divine anger is metaphorical, pointing to His just judgment, not to a human emotion we may imitate. To use it as permission for our own resentment is, Cassian says, to draw from the Scriptures an occasion of sin rather than a remedy of holiness. There is, however, one legitimate use of the energy of anger: we may and should be indignant against the evil thoughts and disordered desires that rise within our own hearts. When we are ashamed of what we would never say or do before others, yet find it stirring inside, we are to rage against that disorder, trembling before the all-seeing eye of God. In this sense the psalmist's "Be angry and sin not" (Psalm 4:4) and St. Paul's citation of it (Ephesians 4:26) are understood: be angry with your own faults, lest the Sun of Righteousness set upon a darkened mind and the devil be given place. Cassian's remedies are simple and severe. First, make a firm resolution never to be angry at all-neither for good reasons nor bad. The moment the passion enters, discernment is lost and the soul can no longer be a temple of the Holy Spirit. Second, never attempt to pray while angry; such prayer is obstinate rebellion. Third, keep daily before your eyes the uncertainty of life and the certainty of judgment. All our other efforts- Mass, fasting, works of charity- profit nothing if anger and hatred alone bring us to eternal punishment. Practically, this means catching the first interior movement of irritation and turning it at once into sorrow for our own impatience. It means refusing to nurse the grievance past sunset, seeking reconciliation before the next Holy Communion, and enlarging the heart with patience so that the "waves of anger" are received and dissipated rather than confined and intensified. Peace, Cassian reminds us, does not depend on the conduct of others; it lies in our own control. In the confessional and in the daily struggle of parish life, I see how often this vice wounds families and friendships. Let us ask the Lord, who is meek and humble of heart, to give us the grace to root it out. May the peace of Christ, which surpasses all understanding, guard our hearts and our parish. In other news, due to an unexpected leave, I have been appointed as Vicar General and Chancellor of the Diocese of Charlotte by Bishop Martin. While this appointment is expected to be temporary, during the interim, it will make my ability to take appointments rather limited. Please be patient with the office staff as they try to accommodate those needs along with my additional responsibilities.
By John Putnam • October 30, 2026
On this Solemnity of All Saints, we have the profound joy of celebrating our brothers and sisters in Christ, the saints. This is an especially meaningful feast for us as Christian stewards. At Baptism, each of us receives the call to holiness and discipleship. In other words, we are all called to become saints. Holiness is not reserved for a select few. It is God's desire for every one of His children. The stewardship way of life helps us answer that call each day. In today's Gospel from Matthew, Jesus gives us the Beatitudes. They reveal the qualities that mark the lives of His disciples and point us toward authentic holiness. As we continue striving to live as faithful stewards, the Beatitudes provide a faithful measure of our growth in Christ. The "blessed" that Jesus describes are not different categories of people who make it to heaven. Rather, they reveal the character of those who belong to Him - the poor in spirit, the merciful, the pure of heart, the peacemakers, and all who remain faithful in the midst of trials. None of us can live this way on our own. But as beloved children of God, we receive the grace we need through prayer, the sacraments, and a life centered on Christ. May the example of the saints inspire us to persevere in our own call to holiness, trusting that one day we will join them in the everlasting joy of heaven. © Catholic Stewardship Conference, 2026 Pastoral Pondering October brought us the Church's renewed attention to mental health. Pope Leo XIV has asked us this month to pray that our communities become places where those who carry unseen burdens find welcome, dignity, and hope- not judgment or silence. Many of those burdens are carried by women and girls. Some have lived through abuse, assault, or trauma that few around them even know about. Recent headlines, including those from Cornell University, have reminded the whole country how widespread these wounds are and how alone many survivors feel. Regardless of the outcome and veracity of the Cornell case, these types of cases exist closer to home. Women in our own parish and community often suffer quietly, unsure where to turn or whether anyone will truly understand. There is help, and there is hope. Healed and Restored, the local Catholic ministry founded by our own parishioner Elza Spaedy, exists precisely for this purpose. Through counseling, workshops, spiritual mentoring, retreats, and a supportive community, it walks with women and girls who have experienced abuse, assault, domestic violence, trafficking, or other trauma. Rooted in faith, it helps them encounter the Divine Physician who alone can restore what has been broken and discover that their wounds do not define them. Many of the women who have walked this path have found real freedom and a renewed sense of their dignity as daughters of God. If you are carrying a wound like this, or if you know someone who is, I encourage you to reach out. Information is available at healedandrestored.org. And if you simply want to stand with those who are hurting, please keep them in your prayers. Sometimes the greatest gift we can offer is to notice, to listen without fear, and to point someone toward the healing Christ offers. May the Lord who binds up the brokenhearted make our parish a place of true restoration.