From the Pastor - Feast of the Holy Family

December 29, 2023

Today, we celebrate the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Just as the Holy Family is holy, we are also called to be holy. This holiness is achievable by living as disciples of Christ.


St. Paul calls us to put on “heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience… as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.” Let us “give thanks to God the Father” by being good stewards of His love and mercy to all our family members.

Today's Gospel says a lot about trust and surrender to our Lord. When Simeon and Anna prophesized about what was to come, Jesus' parents were “amazed at what was said about him.” We can imagine that two parents would be taken back by these words! Yet, the Holy Family surrendered their lives to God and had unwavering faith and trust in His plan.


God’s plan will fulfill our hearts more than we could have ever imagined. Like the Holy Family, we just need to trust, surrender and be attentive to God’s voice. © Catholic Stewardship Consultants, 2023

 

Pastoral Pondering

We have been discussing those things that damage, attack, or weaken marriage.


The Church defines marriage as a covenant relationship that is to be a partnership of the whole of life (see CCC, 1601). My academic work in canon law focused on the introduction of this one phrase in canon 1057, §2 of the 1983 Code of Canon Law. And while that might seem to be a rather small thing in the overall scheme of things, it actually gives rise to the overall Catholic understanding of marriage. The institution of marriage has particular properties and ends that make up the substance of marriage itself. These properties are unity, indissolubility and fecundity. These three support the ends of marriage, the good of the spouses and the procreation & education of children. Hence, permanence, fidelity and openness to life are the three legs of the tripod that support marriage and place it on a firm foundation.


Since we’ve already addressed infidelity (adultery) and permanence (divorce), our liturgical feast provides a good opportunity to discuss the openness to children and its importance to marriage.


Paragraph 2366 of the Catechism says this:

Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which "is on the side of life" teaches that "each and every marriage act must remain open 'per se' to the transmission of life." This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act."


Concerning the regulation of births, Paragraph 2370 says this:

Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality. These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, "every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible" is intrinsically evil:


Thus, the innate language that expresses the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive refusal to be open to life but also to a falsification of the inner truth of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality.... the difference, both anthropological and moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle . . . involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of the human person and of human sexuality.


Hence, contraception violates the very essence of marriage because it says, “I give you myself, BUT not this part.”


It is also helpful to remember how prophetic Pope St. Paul VI was when he warned in Humanae vitae:

Responsible men can become more deeply convinced of the truth of the doctrine laid down by the Church on this issue if they reflect on the consequences of methods and plans for artificial birth control. Let them first consider how easily this course of action could open wide the way for marital infidelity and a general lowering of moral standards. Not much experience is needed to be fully aware of human weakness and to understand that human beings—and especially the young, who are so exposed to temptation—need incentives to keep the moral law, and it is an evil thing to make it easy for them to break that law. Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection.


Finally, careful consideration should be given to the danger of this power passing into the hands of those public authorities who care little for the precepts of the moral law. Who will blame a government which in its attempt to resolve the problems affecting an entire country resort to the same measures as are regarded as lawful by married people in the solution of a particular family difficulty? Who will prevent public authorities from favoring those contraceptive methods which they consider more effective? Should they regard this as necessary, they may even impose their use on everyone. It could well happen, therefore, that when people, either individually or in family or social life, experience the inherent difficulties of the divine law and are determined to avoid them, they may give into the hands of public authorities the power to intervene in the most personal and intimate responsibility of husband and wife.


A careful study of the historical record shows clearly how the widespread acceptance of contraception has led to marital infidelity, the bad fruit of the sexual revolution (seeing sexual intimacy as more of a recreational activity than its intended use) including abortion, infidelity, promiscuity, and the like. By extension, we can also see that once the marital act is separated from marriage, marriage loses a sense of what it is, opening the doorway to redefining marriage in any way one wants.


The Dicastery for the Doctrine of the Faith’s recent decision to allow for the blessing of same sex couples who have attempted marriage, while perhaps being well-intentioned, adds to a greater level of confusion about the inherent nature of marriage and its importance to the life of the Church. The document clear that any blessing must be outside of an official liturgical action or ritual, but, human nature being what it is, and priests being fallible as we are, this will be abused and confused leading to even a greater diminishment of the understanding of marriage in our secularized culture.


From the Pastor

From the Pastor - 26th Sunday in Ordinary Time

By John Putnam • September 25, 2026
As Christian stewards, we are called to a high and holy standard — living as Christ’s disciples every day and with every person the Lord places in our path. But we can move towards this goal in “baby steps.” Jesus demonstrates this comforting truth through the parable He tells in today’s Gospel from Matthew. It is the story of two sons whose father instructs them to go out and work in his vineyard that day. While the second son agrees to his father’s request, he does not follow through — he fails to obey the father’s will. The first son tells his father, “no.” At least he is honest! And in the end, he reconsiders and obeys his father. The first son’s honest, less-than-perfect response is consoling to us Christian stewards. Haven’t we all felt this way at times when God’s will for us seems to be just too hard? We can be honest with God at these times. He knows our thoughts already, after all. But when we stay engaged in a real relationship with Him, even if it’s just to say, “I don’t think I can, Lord,” He will supply us with just the grace we need to change our minds and do what He is asking us to do. We can even take a step backward from time to time because our Father is merciful and kind. What matters is that we keep baby-stepping along, assured of the grace we need to more closely imitate the actions and attitudes of Christ. This is the beauty of the stewardship way of life. ©Catholic Stewardship Consultants, 2026 Pastoral Pondering On the Feast of Our Lady of Sorrows, the other priests, seminarians, and I, had the opportunity to attend the Final Solemn Profession of Sister Mary Lucia, DVM. It was a moving experience, and I thought it a good occasion to reflect on the importance of religious life in the life of the parish and the life of the Church. Every Sunday we gather as one family: families in the pews, single adults, children, the elderly, deacons, priests, seminarians, and, often quietly among us, men and women who have given their whole lives to God by the vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. They are not a side chapel of the Church. They stand at her heart. “The consecrated life is at the very heart of the Church as a decisive element for her mission.” — Pope St. John Paul II, Vita Consecrata What does that mean for us here at Saint Mark’s? It means that the Church is poorer—less herself—whenever we forget those who have left everything to follow Christ with an undivided heart. Baptism already consecrates every Christian. Consecrated life is a further, public, stable response to that same baptismal grace: a way of making the face of Jesus—poor, chaste, and obedient—visible in the middle of an age that is often restless, acquisitive, and self-directed. A living sign of the world to come The Catechism teaches that those who profess the evangelical counsels “signify and proclaim in the Church the glory of the world to come.” In other words, a sister who owns nothing, a brother who lives in community, a contemplative who prays through the night, a consecrated virgin living in the world, a missionary who goes where no one else will go—each of them is a living reminder that this world is not our final home. Their lives preach what our words sometimes only hint at: God is enough. That witness is not a luxury. In a culture that measures worth by productivity, possessions, and personal autonomy, consecrated men and women quietly insist that love can be total, that freedom is found in gift, and that joy does not depend on having more. They are, as one religious recently put it, a kind of medicine for the whole Body of Christ—an antidote to our easy compromises with comfort and control. Many forms, one gift Consecrated life is not one mold. From the earliest centuries there have been hermits and virgins, monks and nuns, itinerant preachers and teachers, nurses and missionaries. Today the Church recognizes religious institutes of contemplative and apostolic life, societies of apostolic life, secular institutes, consecrated virgins and widows, and the eremitic life. Some live behind cloister walls. Some staff our schools, hospitals, and missions. Some remain in ordinary workplaces while belonging entirely to Christ. All of them exist for the holiness of the whole Church. History itself testifies to this. The faith was planted and the poor were served in large part because religious families poured themselves out. That work continues. When we thank God for Catholic education, for care of the sick, for quiet hours of adoration offered for souls we will never meet, we are often thanking consecrated persons we may never see. What this asks of us First, gratitude. If a religious sister taught you the faith, if a priest of a religious order heard your confession on retreat, if a contemplative community has prayed for this parish, thank God for them—and, when you can, thank them. Second, prayer for vocations. The Lord still calls. He calls from our families, our youth groups, our college campuses, and our pews. Parents, do not be afraid if your son or daughter begins to wonder about religious life. That question is not a loss to the family; it may be one of the greatest gifts a family can offer the Church. Young people: if the thought of giving everything to Christ will not leave you alone, do not smother it. Speak with a priest or a consecrated person you trust. The Church needs the diversity and richness of these charisms. Third, our own fidelity. Consecrated life does not replace the vocation of marriage or the single life in the world. It illuminates them. The vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience are a concentrated form of what every disciple must live in some measure: detachment, purity of heart, and obedience to the Father’s will. When religious are faithful, the whole parish is strengthened. When we in the pews are faithful to our own state of life, we honor the same Lord they serve. The Church will never be without this gift, because Christ Himself is poor, chaste, and obedient, and He continues to draw men and women into that pattern of life. Let us esteem it. Let us pray for those who live it. And let us ask the Lord of the harvest to send laborers—not only priests, but sisters, brothers, and all who will make His way of life visible among us.  We thank God for the witness of the Daughters of the Virgin Mother who serve here at St. Mark and for all of the religious in the Diocese of Charlotte who give witness to the beauty of consecrated life.

From the Pastor - 25th Sunday in Ordinary Time

By John Putnam • September 18, 2026
Though we can never fully comprehend the perfection of God and His ways, Sacred Scripture reminds us that God's ways are often very different from our own. In our First Reading from Isaiah, the Lord declares, "My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways." As His disciples, we are called to see life from God's perspective, using our time, talents, and treasure with eternity in mind. In today's Gospel, Jesus illustrates this divine perspective through the parable of the workers in the vineyard. Some labor all day, while others are called only near the end of the day. Yet the landowner gives each worker the same wage. Those who worked the longest grumble because they are thinking according to human standards rather than God's generosity. The same temptation can affect us. We may compare ourselves to others and wonder whether everyone else is contributing as much as we are at home, in our parish, or in our community. Instead, we should remember what a privilege it is to have been invited into the Lord's vineyard. Living the stewardship way of life fills our lives with meaning, purpose, and lasting joy. May we thank God each day for calling us to share in His work. ©Catholic Stewardship Consultants, 2026 Pastoral Pondering Why the Church — and Society — Should Welcome Children God’s first blessing on man and woman was not a burden: “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). The Catechism calls children “the supreme gift of marriage.” They are not an accessory to married love. They spring from the spouses’ gift of self. Marriage is ordered to the good of husband and wife and to the procreation and education of children. The Church does not assign a number. She teaches a truth: married love, by its nature, is open to life. A gift, not a possession A child is a person, never a product. Couples do not have a “right to a child.” The child has rights: to be received as a gift, to be the fruit of his or her own father and mother, and to be respected from conception. When we welcome children we cooperate with the Creator. Responsible parenthood is generous discernment before God — not selfish delay, and not closing the marital act against life. For serious reasons a couple may space births. Natural Family Planning honors both the unitive and procreative meanings of marriage. Large families, received with joy, remain a sign of blessing. Couples who cannot conceive are not forgotten: their marriages can still be fruitful in charity, hospitality, and spiritual fatherhood and motherhood. Good for the Church. Good for the city. The family is the first school of the Gospel — and the foundation of the common good. Nations endure when men and women marry, stay faithful, welcome children, and raise them in virtue. Children are not a private hobby. They are tomorrow’s neighbors, workers, caregivers, citizens, and saints. A culture that treats fertility as a problem, delays marriage, or is indifferent to the unborn mortgages its own future. Advocates in public life Families also need a voice beyond the parish. The American Principles Project works to place the family at the center of public debate: parental rights, the protection of childhood, the defense of life, and policies that make it more possible for the young to marry and raise children. A bulletin is not a campaign flyer. The Church baptizes no political organization. Catholics may differ on particular tactics. We may not differ on this: marriage, children, and a parent’s duty are not partisan inventions. They belong to the natural law and to the Gospel. Here at Saint Mark’s Encourage the young couples in the pews. Thank the families who fill our Masses with life. Walk with those who wait for a child. Learn NFP as the Church teaches it. Speak and vote as people who believe every child is a gift. And if God is asking your household for another act of generosity, do not be afraid. He who blesses does not abandon. Children are not a threat to our future. They are our future — and a living sign that God has not finished creating.